In recent conversations with friends, these questions and themes of prayer — and unanswered prayer — repetitively come up as we deal with the pangs of life. 

We deal with shame, health concerns and chronic illnesses, anxiety, loneliness, dead-end and overbearing careers, or the loss of a job, loved one, or relationship. People battle through infertility or miscarriage. Parents struggle with wayward kids. Marriages become intimidatingly hard and filled with strife. 

Life is frustratingly full of these painfully broken moments.

And while grief can be grueling, it sucks even more to feel like we’re alone and pouring our hearts out into a vacuum and void: is God even listening?

We thought God was on our side, ready to show up at a moment’s notice. We were taught in Sunday school, “He will never leave you or forsake you.”

But sometimes, the overwhelming darkness of our suffering feels like a weighted blanket thrown on top of us, and we can’t unravel ourselves from it. We desperately cry out to God, offering prayer after prayer, only to meet His silence.

Or so it seems. 

Our perceptions and emotions rarely tell the whole story.

As the saying goes, God’s silence is not His absence. 

Location: Present and Listening 

The common train of thought we like to ride is that our persistent prayers feel like they’re on the back burner, or we feel like we are not doing enough or maybe we’re doing something wrong. And so, God is giving us a cold shoulder silent treatment. 

But what if that’s not the case? 

John Piper once said, “God is always doing 10,000 things in your life, and you may be aware of three of them.”

That sentiment rings true, especially in our chapters of suffering and waiting on God.

What if God, in love and mercy, is working in our waiting and can’t give us a bullet-point play-by-play of everything He’s up to?

Have our prayers gone unanswered? Perhaps. But is God still there and listening? Yes.

Can I continue to bring my doubts, disappointment, or questions to the Lord — the type of questions I’m afraid to ask? Absolutely.

Can I trust God will hear me out? Definitely.

It is refreshing to know that the Bible has already dealt with the commonality of unanswered prayers and the struggle of waiting. 

The Prophet Micah says, “But as for me, I will look to the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me” [Micah 7:7].

My God will hear me. That is a powerful truth we so frequently overlook. 

Why can Micah seek the Lord and wait on Him? Because He believes that God will assuredly listen. 

Moreover, the entire book of the Psalms speaks volumes on this matter:

“But know that the Lord has set apart the godly for Himself; the Lord hears when I call to Him” [Psalm 4:3]

“The Lord has heard my plea; the Lord accepts my prayer” [Psalm 6:9]

“O Lord, you hear the desire of the afflicted; you will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear” [Psalm 10:17]

“In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I cried for help. From His temple He heard my voice, and my cry to Him reached his ears”[Psalm 18:6]

“I had said in my alarm, ‘I am cut off from your sight.’ But you heard the voice of my pleas for mercy when I cried to you for help” [Psalm 31:22]

“I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to Him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles” [Psalm 34:4–6]

“I waited patiently for the Lord; He inclined to me and heard my cry”[Psalm 40:1]

“I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and he will hear me” [Psalm 77:1]

“He regards the prayer of the destitute and does not despise their prayer” [Psalm 102:17].

“I love the Lord, because He has heard my voice and my pleas for mercy. Because He inclined His ear to me, therefore I will call on Him as long as I live” [Psalm 116:1–2]

“Out of my distress I called on the Lord; the Lord answered me and set me free… I thank you that you have answered me and have become my salvation” [Psalm 118:5, 21]

The Psalm writers leave us no room to doubt God’s ear is attentive. They reinforce again and again the truth that God cares and listens to the hearts of His children.

Scripture gives us the grounds and confidence to bring our real, authentic selves before God’s throne, casting every suffering thought and emotion — good, bad, and ugly — at His feet, trusting He will attend to us with patience and peace.

In her book Safe All Along, Katie Davis Majors beautifully states:

When we go to God with our real emotions, with our deep grief and suffering and our questions, we proclaim that we have a God who hears us, a God who sees us, a God who does not turn away from the hurting. 

He is not a passive or distant God but Immanuel, God who is with us even in our darkest times.

A much-needed reminder. Like Job’s friends who showed up in the initial fallout of his suffering, God is just there. Present with us — grieving with us. 

Even if He is silent, He is there with us in every moment of pain.

I cannot guarantee that God will provide every answer and the clarity we desperately desire — because God often operates in ways we can’t fathom in the present moment — but He will listen. 

Ask. Seek. Knock

As Christians, we tend to try to clean ourselves up or pretend like we’re fine when really we’re cracking underneath it all. 

God invites us to drop the posturing and be real with Him [see 1 Peter 5:6–7].

Tyler and Pete (video above) make it quite clear that the Bible allows us to be human beings in the presence of our Maker. The Bible’s heroes of faith exhibit a raw honesty that should remind us not to pretend to be anything we’re not.

If we’re mad, confused, or grieving, we can bring our authentic feelings to God: He’s big enough to handle them.

And amid all our pain, there is a prayerful path forward.  

Don’t stop praying; God wants you in His presence, vulnerably pouring out your suffering soul to Him.

Reframe your suffering; reexamine and realign your perception and expectation of who God is and what He’s doing in your life.

Don’t become a recluse; isolation is where the Devil thrives in attacking our sensibilities.

This timeless wisdom has been refreshing to my soul as I continue to grow through life’s trials and wrestle through the silent seasons. 

Will God listen to me? Yes, He will. 

Jesus stands ready to receive. He bids us to come as we are, and He is sure to listen: He desires to be near the brokenhearted, bind up our wounds, and provide the healing we desperately need.

The throne room is open. We don’t have to fear going in. God sits eagerly to hear His children.

As John Newton once wrote: